In Memorium

Dear Reader:

On the morning of September 11, 2001, I took a call from my husband as I was driving to my weekly counseling appointment.

“Something horrible has happened,” he said with uncharacteristic alarm.

You mean another horrible thing…I thought. It had been six weeks since my well-loved 36-year-old brother had died and only two weeks since we’d buried him. I was heartbroken; life was off-kilter, out of focus. Every time the phone rang, I anticipated more horrible news. I was living with the burden of a heightened sense of vulnerability.

That day the collective sorrow of the nation merged with my personal grief. I pondered what we term “senseless death” as I did when Matt passed. People taken too early, before hopes and dreams can be realized. Families left wondering why. Faith and equilibrium threatened.

The lives lost on 9/11 became part of our country’s history. Matt’s life was part of my history. The parallel drew me closer to all those who suffered that day. Loss and sadness are part of what it means to be human. It is there for all of us to experience together, but ultimately to resolve on our own.

Today, I remember my brother, Matt, who was taken too soon. I miss spending time with him; it was so easy. I remember the nearly 3,000 people who lost their lives on that awful day when as a nation we felt our collective vulnerability. I remember, most of all, that loss is part of life, and as such, kindness should be our imperative.

With heartfelt condolences to all who have loved and lost,


9-17 post


9 thoughts on “In Memorium

  1. 9/11 shattered the whole world. We were living in Fiji at the time, which is around 16 hours ahead of New York. We woke to the news. It hit my husband particularly hard. His employer’s head office was in New York. Their offices were situated level with the first impact point. He knew colleagues who were working there at the time, and had only been in New York two weeks prior, meeting with them.
    We visited the memorial in New York a few years ago. It was heart wrenching, but so beautifully done. I still cry whenever I think about what happened that day.
    It would have been truly awful for you to be confronted by this tragedy, on such a huge scale, while you were in deep mourning over your brother.
    Some things we will never be able to make sense of. xx

      1. Fiji! Those were the days… We married in 2000, and when we got back from honeymoon we moved into our ‘forever home’, but by the end of that year we found ourselves living in Fiji for my husband’s work.
        We’ve moved into our ‘forever home’ three times! Oh, wait! Make that soon to be a fourth! (You’ve just given me a great idea for a blog post, Michele – thanks! You’re such a good source of inspiration 😊)
        We spent three years there. You could say, ‘it was the best of times, and the worst of times’. 🤣
        I should write about that one day, too – seen as how it meets the ‘ten year compost rule’ a writing teacher once told me about.

      2. Oh boy !!!YOU AND I HAVE ANOTHER THING IN COMMON! I’ll soon be writing my “forever home” post. It’ll be great to read yours. I’m not sure about that 10 year rule? Another good topic!

      3. I look forward to reading yours! I’ve got to move back into my house before I can write mine… 😆
        (A temporary situation due to some water damage you wouldn’t believe – it certainly pays to have good insurance!)

  2. ‘Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.’ One of my favourite quotes, which I have seen attributed to the Dalai Lama. My mind has been dwelling on that awful day, 17 years ago. My heartfelt condolences to you all. The repercussions of that event are, unfortunately, still reverberating around the world.

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