How Are You…Really?
Dear Reader:
How are you? Somewhere along the way, we all learned the appropriate response to that question: fine. It’s the quick, polite, automatic, go-to answer that we use in day-to-day conversation.
I use it myself, with one variation. When I raise my eyebrows, let out a quiet sigh and say
“fine, fine,” its a big clue that I’m not fine. The “double fine” is shorthand for “I’ve been better, but let’s not dwell upon it.”
My favorite people in the world are the people who ask me how I am and wait for the answer. These people really want the truth. I can dish out the good, the bad and the ugly and they’ll stick around and listen!
The thing is, most of the time, I am fine. I have my ups and downs just like anybody, but I’m living a very good life. “Fine” was a perfectly fine answer until it wasn’t.
In March, I felt determined to meet the challenges of life in a pandemic. I was busy stocking my pantry, happy to eat bowls of pasta and cereal and riveted to the news.
By April, I’d gained three pounds, stopped sleeping through the night and learned how to set up a Zoom call. I was tired, anxious and depressed.
May brought with it the realization that I wasn’t going to be going back to the gym anytime soon. We turned the garage into a gym and I started virtual training sessions. I was sore and tired and still consuming large quantities of carbs and news.
June was hot and so is July. My backyard is my oasis. When I recline on the lounge chairs or float in the pool, I forget who the president is or how many people have died from Covid 19. I am eating more green food and watching less news, but I am tired all the time.
How are you? I really want to know.
If there is something good to have come from the pandemic, I feel this may be it: people are reaching out to each other to tell them exactly how they feel. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t receive a communication from a friend. Usually, I talk to multiple friends in one day. There are cards in the mail, notes on the porch, messages on Instagram, emails, phone calls and texts.
Seems we’re really not fine and, for now, we want to talk about it. I’m here to listen.
Michele
Lovely post, Michelle! I am fighting discouragement, but every day has at least one glimmer of real hope.
And I agree that shady backyards (or some sort of haven!) are essential to this time on earth…
ty Pam…yes, let’s be grateful for the “glimmers!” Take care
One of the difficulties of answering the question “How are you?” is that it can change so quickly. For me, July has been an improvement because it is a month full of birthdays. I’ve called several relatives and friends and shared with them stories of how we are surviving all the changes of this year. I’m trying to ignore the public news and enjoy the pleasure of sharing experiences with people I don’t often hear from. Thanks for sharing your experiences, Michelle.
Agreed…I have mood transformations all day! I just ordered your book…can’t wait to read it!